Contributor: E. Taylor

Who knew love and loss could both be just as powerful as the other? The pain of both love and loss are rivals in the continuum of life. Love one another as God has loved us – words easier to verbalize, much harder to live. Love pierces not just the heart, but the fiber of a person, their essence, and soul. Love is seen manifested in their daily life – activities, interactions with others, thoughts, home, work, family, friendships, correspondence, and all communication. 

Show and live love, live a life that exemplifies Christ, and that touches others. Wherever you go and whatever you do, let it be something that helps, supports, and blesses someone. Plant, grow and give out flowers while people can still smell them. Losing someone can be as life changing as loving them. How often do we continue to look for them, talk to them, replay their words and conversations, reach for them, search out their smile, seek their familiarity in others? How do we move forward without them, when our hearts burn, our beings ache, tears run, eyes cloud up? The older we get, the deeper the hurts, the harder the pain is to shake, the less time there is to waste on dislike, disdain, distress, denial. 

Loss comes in all shapes and sizes – separation, divorce, death, unemployment, bankruptcy, sickness, moving residences, empty nests, foreclosure, depression, hopelessness. As we age, we have to muster the energy and hope to combat these losses, for our warfare is not against the flesh and blood embodiment of these things, but it is against the spiritual, the forces that are unseen and not visible to the physical eye. 

Grow older gracefully using the wisdom God has granted each of us. We must learn to treasure others and moments, make memories, live each day as if it really is our last day here on this earth. It is so easy to get caught up in the past hurts and traumas and to continue carrying them with us daily as if they are brand new occurrences. Lay aside these heavy weights and past hurts as if they are literally hot potatoes. Move forward; smile and make someone else smile; laugh and make someone else laugh. Do what makes you and others happy. Share your heart and your thoughts with others, tell them you love them, share how they make you happy. 

Life is too short, too precious not to take some time to smell the flowers or to give some to others while they can still smell them. Lee Ann Womack sang these words in the song “I Hope You Dance”: “I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance; never settle for the path of least resistance; living might mean taking chances, but they’re worth taking; loving might be a mistake, but it’s worth making…And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance, I hope you dance.” Live. Love. Never stop dancing.

Contributor: A. Dorcent

What is your favorite season? For me, my favorites change as I do. When I was a child, my favorite season was summer! School was out, and we played all day. In high school, my focus changed to learning and observing. I enjoyed the newness of spring. As I moved into my forties, I learned weathered things develop character. My favorite season was fall. I love a beautiful seasoned fall tree. Now, moving into age fifty, winter is my favorite season. During the festive holiday season, I settle down, enjoy family, good food, and a cozy fireplace.    

After twenty-eight years of marriage, we have learned our relationship goes through seasons as well. Our needs and desires determine our season. Things change. We change. 

Here’s what I mean: 

Spring – This was our dating season — a blooming season for us. During our spring, we learned about each other. Of course, we learned mainly the good things. We naively thought, “Wow, you’re nearly perfect!” I remember us having the discussion that we could never make the other upset. Boy, were we wrong! We loved spring, but we learned it was only a season.   

Fall – This was our “I see you” season — the leaves changed. In our fall season, still dating, we learned neither one of us was perfect. We saw each other’s true colors. The worst of us can reveal itself when we become angry. We had to learn how to communicate and give each other space to think about our words and actions. I must admit, in this season, I wasn’t very good. I learned anyone could end the argument by remaining silent, praying, and finding the time and place to address the issue later. 

Summer – This was our passion season — “we want to get married” season. During this season, we had grown out of the dating season. We wanted to be married. The great thing about the passion season, we can raise the temperature at will any season of our marriage. If the passion-meter isn’t at a desirable temperature, find ways to raise the temperature. For us, a weekend getaway works wonders — no work, no children, no housework.     

Winter – Our rest season — cuddle up and pull a throw over us. I’ll never forget when we reached this stage. At the end of the day, my husband and I were sitting on the couch watching television. He asked, “Ready to go to sleep?” He could have announced he was going to bed. Instead, he invited me to rest with him. In this season, we rest in the beauty of the relationship. We reflect on our couple’s accomplishments. We enjoy the family and treasure each moment. However, we don’t consider the road has ended. We also dream.

We are looking forward to our retirement — possibly retiring on a Caribbean Island. It’s a pretty big dream. However, we believe when two people walk in agreement and serve a very big God, all things are possible. 

Things change. We change. What’s your favorite season?

Contributor: T. Dozier-Grady

As a recent graduate from college, I thought I would have experienced dating by now. I thought I was going to find my soulmate in college, but it did not work out the way I thought it would. I was trying to rush into something that God knew I was not ready for. I was still developing as a person, figuring out what I like and did not like, or the person I wanted to become. I did not realize this until my last year of college when I took the Singleness class at KCC. 

If I could go back and give myself any wisdom about being single, what would it be? I would tell myself to learn how to be content with who you are. Make a list of what you like and what you need to improve so that you are a whole and complete person. I made the mistake of getting caught up in what qualities my partner should have instead of focusing on what I could bring to the table. 

Second, do not let everything you see on social media put a damper on being single. I was guilty of doing this a lot. I would look at my news feed and see people my age posting pictures of spending time with their significant other, an engagement ring, or the wedding day. I felt like I should have been dating and in the same stage. I was trying to rush the process without completing the work God had for me. The top priority is learning to be content with yourself and developing who you are through God. 

Another thing I would tell myself is, don’t rush. Pastor Trev preached a sermon on how to maximize the state of singleness. I have come to terms that this season is the time for me to be single. Pastor Trev defined singleness as the “state where you have the greatest opportunities to develop and express who you are.” You can frustrate the person that you bring into a relationship if you don’t know who you are. When Pastor Trev made that statement, I remember thinking, “What do I really like? What are my non-negotiables?”

Four, learn to live within God’s restrictions and see as HE sees. During the Singleness Life App class, our teachers explained that using the boundaries from the Word of God can allow us to learn about ourselves. When we live within the restrictions, then we can avoid unnecessary drama. 

Finally, the most important step of maximizing the state of being single is your relationship with God. This is the foundation. We must understand His love for us and develop our hearing for the Lord’s voice. 

I would recommend for anyone who is single to listen to the “Don’t Rush” sermon by Pastor Trev Evans. Also, Bishop O’neal has written a book called The Ultimate Achievement about the singleness stage. Remember, “singleness is a time for preparation, and preparation is never wasted.” (Bishop O’neal)

Contributor: K. Wyatt

We often give thanks to individuals who play a huge role in our communities. For example, there’s teacher appreciation week, social worker appreciation month, healthcare worker appreciation day, and so on. But seldom do we hear about appreciation and recognition days or months for our spiritual leaders. Of course, they are just as important as other professionals in our communities. And when it comes to religion, there is a mutual understanding that we honor and take care of spiritual leaders for the selfless work that they do. Because if it wasn’t for some spiritual leaders, we might not have the teachers, social workers, doctors, etc. that we rely so heavily upon. Therefore, it is important to honor and recognize our spiritual leadership, as well. 

Mark 10:45 (NIV) states, “For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.” Those who take on the roles of spiritual leaders choose to live a life that reflects that of Jesus Christ. And although Jesus was above everyone else, he still sat and broke bread with sinners and tax collectors (Mark 2:13-17). In the same way, our spiritual leaders want the best for us and will lead by example. However, they will also humble themselves to show their congregation and nonbelievers that they are not better than anyone just because they are performing the Lord’s work. 

Our spiritual leaders show us how to live a life according to the plan of God. They have the ultimate responsibility of helping save our souls and giving us the direction and guidance, we need to make it to Heaven (Hebrews 13:17) and do His work here on earth. The Bible says, “remember your leaders those who spoke to you the word of God. Consider the outcome of their way of life and imitate their faith” (Hebrews 13:7 ESV). This is an extremely important reason to honor our spiritual leadership. 

For many of us, our spiritual leaders are the reason why we put our old ways behind us and started a new life in Jesus Christ. Those who labor in teaching and preaching are worthy of double honor (1 Timothy 5:17). Go and let your favorite spiritual leaders know how much you appreciate them, especially now as they continue to lead us on a path of righteousness through an unforeseeable pandemic.